Back into hiding …

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So I bravely stuck the tip of my toe into the water of being gut-wrenchingly open and transparent on this blog.  And I have to say, I’m feeling way too vulnerable and afraid.

Knowing that my readers have no idea what has happened in my life over the past two+ years, leaves a lot of room for misunderstandings and judgments.  But I’m not currently — if ever — ready to reveal what’s been happening.  It’s too personal, too scary, and also involves people who I feel I don’t have the right to tell their stories publically for them.

Let’s just say I’ve lived through my worst nightmares and am still trying to find my way to a life worth living again.

As there are so few people still reading this blog (less than a handful from the blog stats), I’m just going to go back to privately journaling and regaining my sense of self and personal well-being.

I’d thought that perhaps sharing my own painful journey of healing might be beneficial to others.  And I’ve heard from several folks that it has been helpful for them.  But if sharing my successes and steps forward (and my failures and steps backward) bring me to a place of pain and fear again, then it’s probably not in my best interests at the moment to be that open.  Perhaps later?  Maybe.  Perhaps not.

I may still share things from time to time here.  Photos, poetry, funny stories.  But the vulnerable sides of me will be kept for my personal journal.

Thanks for being there and being understanding.  Sorry I’m being flaky about this blog, but part of the reason I started sharing a little bit again was to figure out if it was a good outlet for me or not.  “Not” is the answer, I guess.

Take care.

~Debi

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5 thoughts on “Back into hiding …

  1. I think you have to do what you have to do. I have followed you off and on and have gathered that you have had many incredibly difficult personal things to live through. From the outside, you appear to be doing so marvelously. I don’t know that I could manage nearly as well as you have. But the pain is there. If this doesn’t work, know that we all still pray for you and do what works for you!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I’ve followed you for quite a few years. I’m glad you’re doing what’s best for you. I don’t know what’s going on in your life recently, but I have always admired your strength and tenacity at the challenges you’ve faced. Your posts remind me to pray for you, even if you don’t share details. (((Hugs)))

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I don’t know what hurtful things you have been going through but you have to do what’s best for you and others will have to understand. I pray for healing for you.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Hey Debi,
    I doubt you remember me, but I was on your OAMC thing way back in the beginning. I have always admired you, and thought you were an amazingly strong person. You have been through so much, and you keep on going! I feel like a turtle (pulling my head back in whenever there is a problem) compared to you. Just want to wish you the very best in the future (in whatever you decide to do) and thank you for being an example of a strong women to so many. I live in Duvall WA and if you ever want to get coffee, I would be honored.

    Liked by 1 person

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